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JEANNE LEITER CLARK (PYTHIA)

 

God was strictly male in the forties.  And the males in my life were minor demi-gods to be obeyed without question.  Father, priests, especially Monsignor, policemen, doctors–they protected me, taught me, molded me.  My teachers (grade and high school) were Catholic nuns, but they were under the supervision and control of the priesthood.

          My parents raised me with the idea that I could be anything I wanted to be, but I was still living in a patriarchal society.  When my grades weren’t good enough for medical school, friends said, “Why don’t you become a nurse, it’s just as good.”  In the forties, the majority of women were secretaries, nurses, teachers, and stay-at-home wives and mothers.

          The problem was, I didn’t want to be ‘just’ a nurse.  It was doctor or another field entirely.  When Monsignor asked my fourth grade class how many wanted to be priests, I put my hand up along with all the boys.  “No,” I was told, “little girls become nuns, only boys can become priests.”  When he asked how many wanted to become nuns, I did not put up my hand.  Obviously, I was listening to a different drummer.

          I was labeled a ‘Trouble Maker’ because I questioned things I should have accepted on faith.  Just how does Free Will work if God already knows everything?  Where do cavemen fit into the Bible? They’re not after Adam because they're not in the Good Book.  I was told they came before, and because they were before Adam, they did not have souls.  Even at this early age, I was bothered.  How could a people who discovered fire, drew magical pictures on cave walls, and buried their dead with grave goods not have souls?  When my brother died at nineteen and I was a very young thirteen, nuns, priests, even God, could not heal my grief.

          At the University of Missouri at Kansas City my algebra teacher was a very moral man although he labeled himself an atheist.  This was a revelation.  A person could be ‘good’ not because he longed for Heaven, nor feared the pains of Hell, but because others were fellow travelers on this earth and should be respected.

          I received a B.A. in Psychology and minors in Biology and Chemistry.  Since there’s not much one can do with a psych degree, I became a Social Worker in K.C. 

          Did I mention I married several semesters before graduating?  After six months of Social Working, Mel and I moved to Southern California.  Two apartment years later we bought a house in Arcadia where we still live with two loving dogs and two perverse cats.

          In 1990 I attended a Celtic Mythology class at Pasadena City College while working as a chemist (go figure).  What happened was . . . I found the Goddess.  More correctly, the Goddess presented Herself to me, and I recognized Her.

          The class introduced me to the prehistory of humans and religion.  A female deity had existed before the male Biblical Yahweh!  Wow!!!  Everything started to make sense.  Reincarnation, Collective Unconscious, Premature Dying, Cavemen Souls, the Sacredness of Nature.  Someone told me that my brother Jerry died because he had fulfilled his task in this lifetime.  This healed my 40 year grief like nothing else had.  I’m still saddened when I remember what might have been; I may cry when I write about him, but I do not grieve.

          In Celtic Mythology class I heard a woman talking to another about trance drumming.  I told her I’d like to try it.  I had to ask three times (this was even more pushy than usual for me) before she finally said, if I read Michael Harner’s book The Way of the Shaman, and learned how to journey on my own, then I could be a guest at one of her drumming circles.

          I did, I did, I was a guest.  I still attend this drumming circle, along with four other women.  I value the insight I receive every month from various Power Animals and my Teacher.

          Around the end of 1992 this drumming sister asked me if I’d like to go to UCLA to hear an archeologist lecture.  I said yes.  She had also asked Judy Tatum.  By the way, the talk was given by Marija Gimbutas!  Another introduction to the society of the Goddess.

          Several months later, Judy called me to see if I’d like to write a tv script with her.  By this time I had written a book, many short stories, poems, and essays.  The bottom line is that we wrote a Star Trek, Next Generation script.

          It doesn’t matter that we didn’t sell the script, because we became friends.  Then we became good friends.  Then we became best friends.  Then we became Soul Sisters.

          I was by her side as she transformed Deviled Eggs into Goddess Eggs, as the Goddess told her to build a Temple.  Together, we slogged through Federal paperwork to establish the Temple of the Goddess. I watched as Judy, now Xia, grow into her power.

          I am profoundly grateful to my parents for raising me to think for myself (even against their own beliefs), my brother Jerry for protecting me, my sister Jackie for teaching me a work ethic and showing me that a woman can still be independent with a husband and five children.  I am grateful for the nuns who gave me an excellent education (brain-washing and molding aside).  I am very grateful to Dr Len Franco for informing me about Goddess Herstory.

          I am profoundly grateful to the Goddess for this incarnation.  Through the Temple I have met some very strong, intelligent women, and loving, compassionate men.  I hope to shine more light on Her so others may see the Divine Feminine residing in all of us, female and male alike.

 

                                                       Blessed Be